Calm down routine for kids: a Calm Corner checklist
A calm down routine gives a child the same few steps to follow when feelings get big: find a quiet spot, take five big breaths, count to 10, have a sip of water and have a hug. Doing them with a grown-up turns "calm down" from an instruction into something they can actually do, and it's a way back together, never a punishment or a time-out.
Here's the Calm Corner routine that comes with Little Streaks, why each step is there, and how it works when it's only needed now and then.
What are the steps of a calm down routine?
Calm Corner
- Find a Quiet SpotSomewhere away from whatever started it. A corner, a beanbag or a step will do.
- Take 5 Big BreathsThe heart of the routine. Slow breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth, like blowing bubbles.
- Count to 10Something to think about other than the feeling. Count together, out loud.
- Have a Sip of WaterA small, ordinary thing to do with their hands, and a pause before talking.
- Have a HugThe end of it: back together. A cuddle with a soft toy counts too.
Five steps, each with a picture, so a child who can't read yet can still follow along. The order matters less than doing them the same way each time, so the routine becomes familiar before it's needed.
Is a calm corner the same as a time-out?
No. A time-out sends a child away. A calm corner is somewhere they go to settle, ideally with you nearby, and the routine ends with a hug. It isn't about whatever happened before; it's about getting back to feeling okay.
When should you use it?
Whenever feelings get too big: a meltdown, a tantrum, frustration with homework, or a fight with a brother or sister. Some days it won't be needed at all, and that's fine.
How do you make it stick?
- Practise when everyone's calm. Try the steps together on a good day, so they're familiar when they're needed.
- Do it with them. Breathe and count together. Your calm helps theirs.
- Keep the spot the same. A regular place makes it easier to go there without a fuss.
- Reward using it, not the feeling. Big feelings aren't bad behaviour. A star for working through the steps is something a child can always earn.
If big feelings are frequent or hard to manage, or something doesn't seem right, talk to your GP or child health nurse.
What do you put in a calm down corner?
Keep it simple: somewhere soft to sit, a cup of water nearby, and perhaps a favourite soft toy to hug. The steps of the routine are what matter, so a picture checklist of them helps too.
Should you reward a child for calming down?
Many families reward working through the steps, rather than not getting upset in the first place. In Little Streaks, when Calm Corner is finished, the app asks a grown-up whether it earns a star, so you decide each time.
Is there a printable calm down chart?
Use Print the checklist on this page for a simple list of the five steps to keep in the calm corner.
How does it work in Little Streaks?
Calm Corner is an Anytime routine. It isn't one of your child's everyday routines, so it's never missed on a good day, has no streak and sends no reminders. It waits in the routine list, under Anytime, until it's needed.
Tap it and it fills the screen in a calm bubbles scene, with nothing else to tap but the tasks and a close button. Your child holds each task to tick it off, with gentle bubbles to celebrate. At the end, Little Streaks asks a grown-up: give a star for it, or not now. A star goes through the grown-up check. Calm Corner starts fresh each time, so it can be used more than once a day.
You can rename the steps, add one (like "Squeeze a cushion"), change the scene, or make any other routine Anytime. The free version includes one child, up to two routines and one reward.
Little Streaks is a routines and rewards app for kids, for iPhone and iPad. Free to start, with up to two routines.
